Motivational Quote of the Day
“Please, eat all the sugar you want. Your addiction to sugar has paid for this house, this boat, this diamond studded butt plug.” - Lord Hambersham, DDS
Cereal of the Day
In 1965 Kellogg's introduced what would become one of its most popular cereals and one of the top four cereals marketed within grocery stores. Apple O's started to appear on shelves, with orange O-shaped multi-grain cereal bits with apple and cinnamon flavoring. It wasn't until 1971 that advertisers decided to change the name to Apple Jacks. It took another 27 years to see the introduction of green O-shapes to the bowl. Since then, there have been X-shapes, red apple shapes and other weird shapes representing various advertising campaigns. Apple Jacks is a staple of the Saturday morning sugared cereal vibe, and since 1998, has a tendency to turn your poop green. Other cereals that turn your poop green include Fruit Loops, Fruity Pebbles, Trix, and anything with heavy dyes.
Apple Jacks has gone through a few mascots as well, starting with the Apple Guy in the 1960s. In classic 1960s creepiness in advertising, this dude was a figure made from cutting a face onto an apple, with a hat, and pieces of cereal for eyes. In the 1970s there were the Apple Jacks Kids, animated children that lasted 21 years. In 1992 there was a brutally honest campaign where kids claimed they eat what they like, referring to the lack of actual apple flavor in Apple Jacks. 2004 saw the introduction of (groan) a Jamaican cinnamon stick named CinnaMon (cringe) and an accident-prone apple named Bad Apple. These two idiots ran for a while, but were actually fused together at some point. Eventually Kellogg's realized how racist CinnaMon was and just changed him to a standard Anthropomorphized cinnamon stick. There have been many variations of Apple Jacks, including one with Marshmallows as well as one with blue carrots. It's unknown if that one turns your poop blue.
News From Earth
Tech layoffs have become an early trend of 2023. As economic growth slows, tech companies have begun to trim thousands of workers around the world. It’s a tough industry to remain in as a career, as it pertains to loyalty to a company. Things have changed since the old days, it’s almost better to get out while the getting is good. That’s without even getting into executive salaries remaining the same or higher while mid-level employees are hitting the pavement. Of course the tech company PR machines are running full time, with Google, Apple and Amazon trying to sell themselves as mere startup companies. It’s absolute bullshit because they’ve built some of the largest organizations in the world and are NOT startups, not in the least. Quickly after Google laid off 12,000 people, Paypal joined the fray with 2,000 layoffs.
Meanwhile, the food industry seems to be picking up steam. Chipotle alone is looking to hire 15,000 people in preparation for burrito season. While this might not initially seem like a good option for all the unemployed tech workers making good money, the average starting pay at Chipotle is $15/hr and it has a clear path to a six-figure salary within three years. This isn’t to say that all laid off tech workers should go get restaurant jobs, but some of them might want to think about a less stressful job. While those in the food service industry might dispute that fact, they’ve never had to spend all day pushing code only to have it kicked back because of a misplaced semi-colon.
Sandwich of the Day
From the proprietary sandwich generation tool:
Dutch Loaf & Brebis Du Puyfaucon With Truffles On Tortilla Bread.
Ephemeral Erosion
Whatever we think about the job market there is one thing that has changed in the past 50 years that we refuse to admit to ourselves because our parents sold us a lie. There is no such thing as corporate loyalty to its workers. There never was. It was a product of the economy and the lack of true competition. Once industries started to expand and technology innovation started moving faster, retiring with a company after working there your whole career became even more of a fantasy. Then pensions were lost during the 2008 recession and people finally started to wake up to the reality that corporations don’t truly give a shit about its workers. Even the executives jump ship when the money is better. Because that’s what it’s all about. And if it’s all about the money for them, why not for us as well?
It’s taking some time to leave that mindset behind though. People still seem to think that working at a large, known organization is somehow akin to job security when in fact, it’s the inverse. The larger the organization, the more likely you are to be included in a round of layoffs. We need to realize that companies hire us for the work we do, not to keep us like pets until we get a gold watch and a moderately healthy 401k. Businesses need a service that we provide and we provide that service until another business needs our services but is willing to pay more. The catch is that companies, knowing this, still look down upon varied resumes with many listings of experience. The trick is to find a new job before leaving the last one, while still spending enough time at each company as to not look like a job hopper. Regardless, waking up to the fact that corporations don’t give a shit about us will only benefit our bank accounts.